POPcorn

*Warning - For those with Attention Deficit Disorder, you can skip to the end and just listen to the YouTube song to keep yourself entertained if you don't want to read.

Popcorn. It's a snack that not everyone fancies, which to me is astounding. There are many people that DO take a kind interest to this corn kernel snack. You can certainly count me in as a fan. You might even trick yourself to think that it's healthier than eating chips. It's not, but eating popcorn makes you LESS guilt ridden than downing a bag of potato chips (I am by no means slighting potato chips, as my body fat percentage can attest to, I do enjoy snacking on chips as well). I simply cannot resist the wonderful aroma of popcorn at the local theater. Like Pavlov's dogs, my body is naturally conditioned to crave for the kernels of joy when I sit in the dimly lit movie theater as I wait for my show to start.

However, like I aforementioned, there are many friends of mine who do not share the same infatuation as I do for this snack. I cannot understand why that is. Some claim the outrageous premium that one has to pay for the snack at the theater as the source of their reluctance to chime in for popcorn. However when the cost is split between two or more people, that cost is negligible. If you're a hotting that's watching a movie with me, don't worry, it will be my treat if you keep telling me how handsome I am that is. My ego needs some boasting. I've heard others say that they've already eaten, but as we all know, despite rather full meals, there is always room for desserts. Why not snacks of the salted variety? The other reasons some have provided me is that they just don't like how it sticks to your teeth. That I can understand. Finally, sometimes, some just don't enjoy eating that snack and because I am such a diplomat, I too, am OK with that as well.

Although I am a fan of popcorn, I must say that not all popcorn that I've encountered in my life time tantalizes my taste buds. Some just simply gets the job done and settles my craving at the movies for popcorn, but the popcorn leaves something to be desired. A good popcorn batch not only must be popped from a popcorn machine but it has to be salted the right way. Some popcorn vendors make the mistake that by covering the popcorn itself with loads of butter or even worse, margarine and think that they've served a good popcorn batch to the masses. I however, argue that this is not the case. Popcorn that is drowned in butter/margarine/'I can't believe it's not butter ' is really not all that enjoyable. Especially when it comes out super soggy. The other problem with drowning popcorn with butter/margarine/can't believe it's not butter or (CBINB for short) is that all the flavor is top heavy. The bottom kernels never get the flavouring it needs. You are now left with a 'mixed bag'. It's like eating sand by the time you pass the middle point and reach the corn that has no flavouring. It is super dry at that point.

This is not to say that I do not enjoy buttered popcorn however. But the solution is to have the right mix of salt that is naturally coated to the popcorn itself. The flavouring must not rely solely on butter/margarine/CBINB.

In fact you inately know which popcorn has the best flavour. I always tend to eat the ones with yellowish hues first and leave the purely white ones alone. I guess the yellow folks win over the white folks for once.

Here are pictures for reference:

As you can see, the picture on the top contains photos of bland tasting 'white' popcorn that solely relies on butter/margarine/CBINB for flavoring, while the popcorn on the bottom is flavorful on it's own right. The bottom side popcorn is what I call "self-sufficient" popcorn, meaning, it requires no outside source for flavouring.

So after years of silent observation, I've come to the conclusion that most popcorn retailers rely heavily on selling the former type of popcorn rather than the "self-sufficient" popcorn. Famous Players is one such cinema chain that sells the former popcorn and even charges an extra .50 cents for butter. Simply outrageous! Margarine is free however but it is less tasty than buttered popcorn. Margarine as some might argue, might not be a healthier choice either I might add. I go for the margarine option at Famous Players cause it is free, and there's no better price than free, because I am still kind of cheap afterall. Moving on....

I've searched high and low for the great tasting popcorn and usually my search usually ends in disappointment. There is a local discount cinema named "The Dolphin" and it sells great popcorn. It used to anyways. Since the cinema shut down after a fire last year and reopened after slight renovations, the popcorn just wasn't the same. At least it offers butter for free. Can't win all the victories I suppose. At the local National fair and amusement park, the popcorn comes close to what I want, but it's usually a hit and miss depending of the freshness of the popcorn and which machine/operator it came from.

So what is the purpose of this posting you ask? Is there no perfect popcorn? Does the world truly end in 2012 like the Mayan calender predicts?? I do not have all the answers to these questions, I just felt like writing about popcorn and you came along for the ride. I did however discover a place that do offer great popcorn after years of personal taste testing. The best popcorn I've discovered near my humble abode comes from an unlikely source. A local hardware store. The Rona Hardware store near my house on weekends have a popcorn machine sitting by the entrance that pops for it's customers as they enter. The fee for the wonderfully tasting 'self sufficient' popcorn? It's by donation as it is usually set up for fundraising for a local charity. It's an unlikely place to discover the best popcorn that I've found so far in the world.

Like many things in life, sometimes the real treasure that you've searched high and low for can be found from an unlikely source. How's that for being deep?

The end.

Conan Joke

"Because of the bad U.S. economy, many Broadway producers have started taking their musicals to China.

In a related story, the entire cast of "Cats" has been eaten." - Late Night with Conan O'Brien